Going For Broke(n)?

 

No! Never! Never say die!

What is it in us that just can’t tolerate the verdict of our apparent fate when we find ourselves in the trouble that we failed to predict? We have all made bright plans for ourselves and our futures. What was it like to wake up in mid-life and find our dreams have crumbled into dust? I have felt like that at times. The gorge rose in my throat and I looked around for something I could smash in my rage at my seeming fate.

What did we do then? Did we give up the ghost? Or, did we change our strategy, find an alternative path? Or did we fiercely continue with the course we had chosen, redoubling our efforts? I always soldiered on.

Why was this our fate? Why were we in that state? Where did we go wrong? Why did the world rise up perversely to frustrate us in our ambitions? Did we contract a disability which limited our freedom of action? Did we construct a web of obligations that we could not deny, tightly trapping us in the wrong place? Did we offend somebody so severely that they resolved to find ways to block our advancement? Did we meet with financial disaster which blocked our progress? Did we miss the turning in the road that could have led to different outcomes? Were we too fearful to seize the main chance when it was presented to us? Were we too self-indulgent, not doing the work required to prepare us for the opportunities we could be offered? Disaster has a thousand children.

 Are we now basking in contemplative satisfaction at our accomplishments, the wars left far behind us? We can yet remember those days when conflicting emotions wracked our minds and bodies. Can remember our moments of indecision, the fear of failure in our hearts, visioned in our minds. We imagined the horror of seeing our failure in the eyes of others. We can recount to ourselves our lucky escapes, our happiness at our good fortunes, and our decisions that were wise in retrospect. Those along with those others that were not so wise.

Many of us have some inner drive that commands us to venture, to seek to accomplish things. Many of us have  issues that command our allegiance. We might be wise and plan. Or, we might impetuously launch ourselves into the tasks facing us. We can examine our chosen courses with care. Or, feeling that what is there to be done is so obvious, and so urgent, we just go for broke, accepting the risk of being broken.

 Those of us with some life experience think about those of you out there who still have plenty of stuff to work out in these arenas. Those still making their way through the undergrowth of life, as they pursue their careers, are confronting these challenges every day.

My Bride says I always jump into the boat without looking. This critique stems from a story I told her about when I, as a camper, not knowing how to get down from a dock, just threw myself down into the boat, accepting as a necessary cost the bruises I might accumulate.

She might just be right about the strategy I used in considering potential employments. I changed jobs about four times in my career. Each of those changes involved responsibilities far removed from the training which I had received at the universities I attended. Each of them appeared to me to offer opportunities for personal achievement, but each certainly carried substantial risks I did not always parse. In that sense, my Bride’s critique was certainly appropriate.

My feeling, however, is that one cannot truly predict what conditions will be like in any new venture twelve months hence. The world around us sometimes changes radically from the realities we initially envisage.

I blithely assumed that I would find within myself the resources to succeed at any task I might face. Each position involved multiple changes in roles. For at least some of them, I was wrong about my capacity to adapt. Some required a quick change to other duties. But, in most cases I was successful in finding satisfied customers. If I agonized, fear spurred me on. When unhappy with my situation, I moved on before my employers despaired. I was always going for broke.

At its essence, I developed the view that whatever the circumstance, I would ultimately be able to find the appropriate responses to the challenges that appeared. I Sometimes I had the advantage that my work colleagues did not match my commitment to doing the hard labor necessary to find success. Sometime I found allies permitting collective endeavor. I always assumed that if one was willing to work hard enough, one could find the answers necessary to achieve what was thought of as success.

I confess that my experiences led to a certain arrogance and faith in my capacity to respond successfully to any challenge I met . It was also associated with such total devotion to my employments that other elements of life, like family time, or other interests, had a very low priority. Family life suffered as it does for so many wedded to their jobs. There is a price to be paid for everything in life. I became very narrow in my interests. I could not have been a very interesting person to know.

Nobody has the ultimate prescription for career success that will fit all situations. But, don’t we often regret more the chance we did not take, rather than regret the ones we did? My tendency was to lean toward the bold! This is not just a guy thing, I believe! Not anymore, anyway!

What’s happening at your place? How are things working out for you, those of you out there still alive?